


A very Freelancer Karaoke Night

by Metrowolf



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: F/M, Karaoke bar shennanigans, No one gets hurt, and being happy, idiots singing and drinking, yay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-20
Updated: 2015-02-20
Packaged: 2018-03-13 21:03:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3396248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Metrowolf/pseuds/Metrowolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a fun little something I've been working on in my free time.<br/>For the best experience, listen with the playlist: http://8tracks.com/metrowolf/a-very-freelancer-karaoke-night<br/>(please read the annotations)</p>
            </blockquote>





	A very Freelancer Karaoke Night

“All of us are really going to go sing karaoke?”

Washington stared at the tiny room York had rented for the nine of them. It had been almost four months since they had been on shore leave because of Insurrectionist activity, and they were going to spend their first night in the city singing? Wash wasn't even that good. But when he opened his mouth to protest he was immediately shushed by York.

“Yes, all of us are going to sing newbie. It's traditional,” York said furiously. He jumped unto the stage and began setting up the machine.

“It would have been easier to use the stairs,” North pointed out softly.

“Don't care.”

South pulled out a flask and took a deep swig. From the way the liquid inside it sloshed, Washington figured it was almost empty. South caught him staring. “I refuse to do this sober. York pulls this shit every time we're at this port, and Carolina thinks it's team building or some shit so I can't get out of it.”

“You had fun last time,” Carolina reminded her.

York let out a triumphant laugh as he got the machine on and working. It was an older model, but from the looks of things it had an extensive collection. “It's got everything. I love this bar.” York patted the machine that was older than him as if it were a child he were proud of.

“Everything? What if I don't find a song I like?” Washington asked.

The rest of the the group groaned, save for York who just smiled. “Kid if you can think of a single song that's not on here you don't have to sing tonight.”

“Hey, how come I never got that offer?” South asked.

“I don't like you,” York pointed out cheerfully. He swiped a holographic order card over the machine and it whirred to life, preparing his song. “This first one goes out to-”

“Carolina.” The rest of them minus Wash finished for him.

“He always starts off with the cheesiest love song he can find and dedicates it to her,” North explained.

“I think it's cute,” C.T pointed out quietly.

An upbeat tune started playing, York tapped his feet to the beat. One hand firmly on the microphone, the freelancer thrust the other one at Carolina as he started singing. “Oh don't you dare look back, just keep your eyes on me! I said you're holding back, she said shut up and dance with me! This woman is my destiny, she said wooo-” he wailed, “shut up and dance with me!”

“I like this song,” Washington smiled. He looked around only to discover Carolina was the only one still watching York. The rest were going through the holo-chips they had received at the front of the bar, finding a song to sing.

York continues to belt it out, slightly off tune but grinning the entire time. He spun around enthusiastically, and Washington felt mildly concerned he was going to fall off the stage. Once he finished he struck a pose, and all of them clapped, albeit South was doing so sarcastically.

“Thanks babe,” Carolina commented as he jumped back off the stage. She took her chip and climbed the stairs onto the stage. “This one is for you York.” Their team leader added as she swiped the card.

York grinned widely, until the music started. A heavy guitar riff played, and Washington recognized the song immediately. You're going down by a band called Sick Puppies.

“I find the perfect song, and this is how she repays me?” York stuck his tongue out.

“To be fair, you deserve this Mate,” Wyoming pointed out. Carolina started the song as if none of them were trying to talk over her.

“What?! I have been the model of perfect boyfriend-”

“You do remember that you offered to give North a sponge bath last week right?” C.T added cheerfully.

“He was injured, he could have used the help,” York said defensively.

“No, I didn't,” North shook his head.

“Well, the offer still stands,” York couldn't resist adding. North just laughed.

Carolina sang passionately, and Wash had to admit she wasn't half bad. Every time she sang the line “You're going down,” she made sure to make eye contact with her teammates. Even Maine squirmed under her serious gaze.

“Only Carolina would use karaoke night as an excuse to reestablish her dominance.” Washington pouted.

“My turn!” North said as Carolina's song came to an end. She gave him a high five as he walked across the stage and took the microphone from her. A card was swiped and a song started. North took a deep breath and sang, “Hey brother, there's an endless road to rediscover. Hey sister, know the water's sweet but blood is thicker.”

Wash couldn't help but let his jaw drop as North closed his eyes and really got into the song. “York you said we'd all suck at singing,” he hissed furiously. No one was going to talk at a normal volume when North was singing,

“I lied,” York whispered back.

North tapped his foot during the instrumental, looking around the room while he waited for the words to resume.

Once his song finished he handed the microphone off to C.T.

The shortest freelancer took the microphone and tapped it twice on her palm. “I just wanted you guys to know, you're not going to like my song choice.”

“Country?” South asked.

“Rap?” Wyoming said pointedly. South glared at him.

“Classical?” Maine rumbled making the rest of them jump. He had been so quite Washington forgot he was there.

C.T swiped her song choice and a the lyrics started immediately. A twang behind C.T's voice let them know South had been right. But it quickly became obvious C.T hadn't been referring to the genre. “If I die young bury me in satin, lay me down in a bed of roses. Sink me in the river at dawn-” The song was the slowest yet, and she swayed slightly to the beat.

Washington looked down at his chip before deciding on his song. C.T wasn't half bad he decided. She was going to be a tough act to follow.

Once she finished she bowed slightly, and walked toward the front of the stage, the microphone in hand. Washington jumped up to take it from her, only to fall face first as he tripped over a chord.

“Nice wipe out, 7 out of 10,” South laughed from the back as C.T helped the youngest freelancer back to his feet.

“Alright, this one goes to South,” Washington said indignantly, rubbing his nose. He watched North and York continue to flip through songs, both of them holding beers he hadn't noticed them get. In fact, most of the freelancers seemed to have some kind of beverage, save for Florida. It occurred to Wash that he hadn't ever seen Florida drink before. Wash swiped his card.

“Show me how to lie, I'm -your fuck-getting better all the time-” Washington started, before stuttering over one of the lines. He had the freakin words in front of him and he still fucked it up. He heard South laugh again and tried to block her out. The youngest agent pushed through the rest of the refrain, picking up the volume when he reached the chorus. “Dance fucker Dance! Man I never had a chance!”

“Hey! Language!” Florida called out. Washington winced, he hadn't even noticed. He finished the song weakly, stuttering over a few more of the lines. C.T clapped for him when he finished, but he didn't want to be on the stage anymore.

He passed the microphone to Florida who smiled pleasantly as they got onto the stage. “Hello, everyone, how are we feeling tonight?”

“This isn't a comedy club just sing something Florida,” South blurted out. North looked over at her and took the beer she had just opened.

“And you're completely positive I can't do anything by Flo-Rida?”

“Good lord no,” Wyoming shuddered.

“Alrightly then, I've been looking forward to this for some time now,” Florida cleared their throat as a slow beat started and sang, “struck by lightning, sounds pretty frighting but you know the chances are so small-”

“I've never heard this song before,” Washington whispered to Carolina who was sitting across from him.

She leaned across the table to whisper back, “It's by an uncommon band called The Barenaked Ladies.”

“I like the name of the band the most,” York gave a smile and two thumbs up to Florida.

Carolina just shook her head. “I think they're pretty good, but I'm not sure it was the best choice for Flowers. Just doesn't suit their voice.”

Back on stage Florida was just getting to the chorus, and was doing that little grin they did that made Washington feel very afraid. He turned back to his card to pick his next song, and didn't look up until Florida was done and bowing.

“I think Maine should go next,” South said seriously as Florida hopped off the stage and got back on their seat next to North.

“You first,” Maine replied without looking up.

South shrugged, snatched her beer back from her brother and took a deep swig. She slammed the bottle on the table and took to the stage. “Alright, this one goes to C.T and Carolina too because why the hell not?”

“This is going to be good,” York commented.

“I was just thinking the opposite actually,” C.T snarked back at him.

Once she swiped her card a harsh techno beat started playing. Wash knew this song, he loved it in junior high. “Nice legs, daisy dukes, make a man go,” She pulled the microphone away from her lips to wolf whistle loudly at Carolina. Connie and Washington erupted into laughter. “That's the way they all come through like-”

“Classy,” Carolina shouted to North.

“Don't even pretend to be surprised,” He shouted back. Washington noted that North took his sister's beer again, but this time he took a small sip from it before setting it back down.

She didn't even attempt to sing it coherently, and was simply shouting at the microphone by time the song ended. North and C.T clapped for her, but North got up to stand by the edge of the stage in case she needed assistance in getting down. She didn't.

“You're up asshole,” South chided, pointing to Maine.

He gave her a small shrug and took the steps onto the stage. Wash didn't notice the rest of his team elbow each other and snicker, and so when the music starts and they all changed from laughter to loud groans of agony he was completely lost.

Wah Wah “What's new pussycat? Whoo-” Maine started loudly, his voice a whole lot deeper than Washington thought right for the song.

“York you said you deleted this song!” South shouted furiously from the other side of the room. She took the beer back, and this time North didn't protest. If anything, he looked like he needed another beer as well.

“I thought I did too, jesus he must have hacked it!” York shouted back.

“Good show chap,” Wyoming chuckled.

“I don't get it, whats wrong with this song?” Washington asked.

“Last time we came here he sang what's new pussy cat seven times _in a row_ before Wyoming stole the mic from him. But Reggie just sang it's not unusual and then gave it right back. Maine sang what's new pussycat five more fuckin times before we pulled the plug and called it a night,” Connie explained. “Before we set out tonight York-” she glared at the agent when she spoke his name, “promised he deleted it but obviously that didn't happen.”

“If you help me distract him, I'll grab the mic,” North said seriously. He had been talking to York, but Carolina was the one who nodded and got to her feet. “Uh, I meant after the song,” they all looked at him. “What? He deserves a chance to sing just like the rest of us.”

Carolina and North were on the stage before the song had even finished. Maine, sensing he wouldn't be able to take both of them in a fight relented the microphone. “You're up,” North spoke into the microphone, looking down at Wyoming.

The last freelancer got to his feet and took the microphone from North. Wyoming grinned and swiped his card. Wash didn't recognize the tune, but York leaned across the table and whispered to him, “it's a James Bond theme song, those are the only damn songs he ever sings when we give him the choice.”

“This is the end, hold your breath and count to ten,” He wasn't very good, but Wyoming sang the song with a passion Washington had never seen him put into anything else before. His accent really came to life when he got to the chorus.

When he finished York went back up, grabbing the mic from him. “Ok, that's everyone right?” there were murmurs of consent from the rest of the gathered freelancers. “Alright, well that means I can go again! I would also like to dedicate this song to Carolina,” He swiped his chip.

“Didn't he learn the first time?” Washington asked.

“He never learns,” North replied.

A country song started up, another one Wash didn't recognize. “Once upon a time, a few mistakes ago-”

“Is that...?” South started.

“He's singing Taylor Swift this is fucking great!” Connie confirmed.

“I knew you were trouble when you walked in,” York sang, grinning his stupid little grin. Carolina was laughing, until he sang the next part. “Now I'm lying on the cold hard ground. Ahhh!” He shouted suddenly, and the rest of them jumped.

“He's doing the goat version are you kidding me,” South gasped, laughing loudly. She set the beer down and made a move to stifle her laughter, and ended up falling from her seat. York stopped and they went silent for a moment, but South simply started laughing again.

“Nice wipe out, 9 out of 10,” Washington said in a smug voice as North helped his sister back up and York resumed his song.

“Still better than you,” She shot back.

“I think you're done for the night,” Carolina said from the other side of the room, pointing at the nearly empty bottle of beer.

“I couldn't agree more,” North nodded, taking it for good this time. South just scowled.

Carolina walked up to the stage once York finished, giving him a quick kiss as she took the microphone. “I liked that one a whole lot better than the first one,” She grinned.

“Really? You just don't appreciate love songs,” York chided.

“Maybe, this one goes out to you too,” The ginger shrugged, before she used her chip to select the next song. A slow beat started. “Love of mine, someday you will die,”

“Harsh,” Wash winced.

York took a sip of his beer. From the bottles next to him it was probably his third. Probably. “Hey, I'll take it.”

Carolina continued, “but I'll be close behind, I'll follow you into the dark.“

While the rock song had been good, Carolina nailed the love ballad, and by the end of it York was in tears when he stood up to clap for her. Wash and Wyoming both stood up to go next, but once they made eye contact Wyoming sat back down.

“New guy goes first,” The British man decided, waving his hand for Wash.

“You just made that up,” Washington stuck his tongue out. He climbed onto the stage, careful not to trip again, and plugged his song in. A familiar piano note rang out, and immediately York jumped to his feet.

“I'm singinging this!” He slurred, nearly tripping over himself to get onto the stage. “I'm singing this with you, move, weres the other damn microphone, NORTH!” York shouted his best friends name, “Get your ass up- JUST A SMALL TOWN BOY!” He cut off as the actual words started.

North climbed up on the stage to sing along with the both of them. York had found a second microphone and was singing loudly into it, while Washington and North stood behind him sharing a mic and doing vocals. Wash felt a little flustered singing with North, but York was so loud nobody could tell that he wasn't nearly as good. By the end Wash was shouting to match York, and he completely forgot he was embarrassed by his singing voice. “DON'T STOP BELIEEEVIN'”

Once the three of them finished York hopped off the stage, nearly tripping, and kept a hold of the extra microphone. Wyoming walked past him, chuckling. “Hey Wyoming, no more James Bond theme songs, you hear me?”

“Oh my dear York, I would never,” Wyoming replied, but Wash saw him dab at his card, as if he were hurriedly changing his selection.

He climbed onto the stage and started his song.

“Is that-” C.T started

“The Doctor who theme song un-fucking-believable,” York groaned. “That's it, no more theme songs for any god damn British show you prick!”

“Way to follow the letter of the law and not the spirit,” Carolina grinned. She took another sip of her beer, but none of them seemed to be having any sort of affect on her yet.

Wyoming hummed along to the theme song because as it turned out, the song he picked didn't have any words. Florida and Maine were the only people to clap for him. He handed the microphone off to South, who had stood up before he even finished. She stepped onto the cheap bar stage as if it were a Las Vegas casino and a hard rock cord started playing seemingly before she even swiped her card.

“Don't give a damn 'bout my reputation!” South shouted more than sang. C.T started laughing immediately. “You're living in the past, it's a new generation!”

“I thought for sure her next song was going to be 'bad girls',” York said.

North shook his head. “She did that last time.”

When she finished they all clapped for her, more impressed that she had done the whole song in her stupor than they were with her singing. She hopped gracefully from the stage and handed the mic over to Maine.

“If you sing what's new pussy cat one more time so help me Maine I will end you,” Carolina threatened.

Maine just growled back at her before swiping his card. It was not What's new pussy cat. It was an old song that Washington rather liked, Animal I have become by Three days Grace. “I can't escape this hell-”

Washington looked up at Florida, but if the older man cared about Maine cussing he kept it to himself. Yeah Wash thought about one time when Maine absolutely demolished a special ops crew before realizing he was in the wrong building. He proceeded to go to the right place, and fuck their shit up as well. Maine could cuss if he wanted.

“Why are all of our songs from the 2000s?” Wash whispered quietly. Connie shrugged back at him.

“Good time for music?”

Once Maine finished his song Connie took the stage. Unlike her first song, this one immediately started with a hip beat. “I hear your heart beat to the beat of the drums,” she tapped her foot twice to the beat, “Oh what a shame that you came here with someone! So while you're here in my arms, let's make the most of the night like we're gonna die young!”

Wash frowned. He was noticing a trend with her song choices, and he didn't like it.

Once C.T was done North took the stage. The rest of the group went silent as he started to sing. “Coming out of my cage and I've been doing just fine, gotta gotta be down because I want it all,” He sang. “It started out with a kiss how did it end up like this? It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss.”

“Who's this song to?” Wash whispered.

“I think you know,” Florida whispered back. They both looked over at York, but the brown haired freelancer was busy looking at his card.

North finished his song, and set the microphone down. Washington quickly decided that he didn't like seeing North after he'd had a few drinks. After glancing around the room to make sure everyone else had gone, Florida stepped up to go again. They were the last one, and Washington could help but wonder what the freelancers were going to do once everyone had sang twice.

“How are you feeling tonight South?” Florida very pointedly asked the drunk freelancer. She didn't yell at him, but grinned and flipped them off. Florida chuckled in reply, and suddenly Wash was frightened for her even though she was definitely not someone he had ever cared about protecting before.

Florida swiped the card and a surprisingly happy beat started. Then the lyrics kicked in. “This is your time to pay, this is your judgment day,” Butch sang cheerfully.

The rest of the freelancers went completely silent as they sang. “You better get ready to die!”

“Holy shit,” whispered York as Florida hopped off the stage. “Does anyone else want to go after that?”

“Well I'm not sleeping tonight,” Wash muttered as he took another sip of his drink. Florida was fuckin scary, even with that ridiculous pop music blaring in the background.

“Oh please, I just thought the song would be a nice dedication to South,” Florida chuckled. North instantly moved to put himself between South and Florida. His twin just shrugged.

“I think we're going to call this a night, since I don't want to have to explain to the director why the best soldiers in the galaxy killed each other at a karaoke bar,” Carolina said seriously, standing up and putting her hand on Flower's shoulder. They just smiled back at her.

“My moneys on the twins winning,” C.T said suddenly.

“Not right now, look at the state South is in,” Wyoming shook his head. “I'd say Florida.”

“Do not turn this into a thing,” Carolina warned, but it was already too late. The rest of the freelancers, North, South, and Florida included, were already discussing a hypothetical fight, and who would win. In the end the vote was for the twins, since North was actually really frightening when he wanted to be.

They left the bar in various states of inebriation, Carolina herding them with all the grace of someone who was trying to herd stray cats. To be honest Wash was impressed the bar was still standing, it faired a lot better than the last time he had gone drinking with the freelancers on shore leave. Wash took Connie's hand as they walked back to base, listening to York joke loudly and the rest of them try to talk over him.

Washington was the newest to the top ten, and was still adjusting to life with them. They were all pretty much assholes, but sometimes these guys were interesting company.

 


End file.
